I Do Not Feel Pretty Today

I am incredibly hungover. I am so hungover, in fact, that I did not even pay enough attention to the obligatory morning look in the mirror before I left the apartment to realize that one of my pants legs is shorter than the other. OMG I AM AT WORK AND THEY ARE DIFFERENT LENGTHS how am I so retarded?

It was risky even putting these pants on in the first place. For starters, they were an impulse purchase at Pretty Girl (yes I am, thank you!) on 14th Street, because they are black and were $7.99. Also, they are certainly not professional, but that doesn't change the fact that they are the most comfortable yoga pants I've ever laid on my body. I have been contemplating trying to get back into yoga, and before I went out drinking, I thought today would be the day. Also, I figured if casual Friday means most of the company wears jeans, I might as well wear something more casual than jeans, as I wear jeans everyday anyways and wearing them on Fridays would not really be dressing down for me. However, you'd think that I would have noticed the leg length problem one of the other 6 times I've worn these pants before. Noo, no, here I am, wanting to puke my guts out at the mere thought of the word puke, and I'm in the office bathroom noticing my pants look like they were hemmed by a blind man.

and that is all. I hope you are having fun in Dad's car, listening to anti-Christmas music and/or Frank's Place.

xoxoxoBon